change /Chānj/
verb: make or become different
noun: the act or instance of making or becoming different.
At a philosophical level, we’re experiencing constant change every second of the day. From the basics such as taking a breath to each thought that comes and goes. Each one involves change, as they are each technically different from the last.
So why do so many of us dislike or fear change? Especially as we’re going through it all the time.. I know my default can be to seek out comfort and stability, and change often disrupts that. At work I’ve enjoyed the benefits of routine, where I know my commute, have the same desk, the same familiar work colleagues and the same types of meetings throughout the day. It’s helped me feel safe while at the same time enabled me to not have to think about them, as they don’t change (similar to Steve Jobs always wearing the same clothing. He did this to free up his time having to think about what to wear each day).
“You must welcome change as the rule but not your ruler” ~Denis Waitley
The same can be said outside of work. The familiar home, suppers, TV shows and weekend chores / walks, all add up to safety and the ability to go through a day almost on autopilot (a term and feature in itself used for safety). Add all of this together and you can see that change can be disruptive and upsetting.
I fell into a life of little change a few years ago. I didn’t intend to, it just happened. I had a comfortable job, lived in a nice area, worked and socialised with lovely familiar people. The only real daily change that happened was each breath I’d take and the thoughts I’d have. Life was no longer as challenging as it was meant to be, with lessons to learn, failures to reflect on and uncomfortable experiences to cherish.
So last year, with the help and support of the special people in my life, I turned it all upside down and began to focus on experience over everything else. The questions I asked my self were:
1. What should I be learning?
2. Am I making the most of my time here?
3. How can I be more grateful?
Since then I’ve focused my gratitude journaling for change, become a father for the second time, blogged every week on this site, changed jobs, moved countries and at times experienced a more uncomfortable state than at any other time in my adult life.
Change is shaping me again and I’m more challenged (and ultimately fulfilled) than I have been in years. Without embracing change, I would have missed out on the new wonderful people and experiences I now have in my life. I’m grateful for that.
Change is wonderful.
“Do what you will. Even if you tear yourself apart, most people will continue doing the same things.” – Marcus Aurelius, Meditations